Colossians 3:1-17
So if you have been raised with Christ, seek the things above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things above, not on earthly things. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God. When Christ, who is your life, appears, then you also will appear with him in glory. Therefore, put to death what belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desire, and greed, which is idolatry. Because of these, God's wrath is coming upon the disobedient, and you once walked in these things when you were living in them. But now, put away all the following: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and filthy language from your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since you have put off the old self with its practices and have put on the new self. You are being renewed in knowledge according to the image of your Creator. In Christ there is not Greek and Jew, circumcision and uncircumcision, barbarian, Scythian, slave and free; but Christ is all and in all.
Therefore, as God's chosen ones, holy and dearly loved, put on compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a grievance against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so you are also to forgive. Above all, put on love, which is the perfect bond of unity. And let the peace of Christ, to which you were also called in one body, rule your hearts. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell richly among you, in all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another through psalms, hymns, and spiritual songs, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts. And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
These verses guide us as Believers in how we should live our lives. Whenever we face life, these words always help us know how to live.
Handling hurtful words and actions...
There is a difference between someone sharing a disappointment with your words or actions and a fracture of the heart.
I'm going to talk about the fracture of the heart and forgiveness.
Forgiveness is a choice. It is also a process. There is no time limit on working through the loss.
- Identify specifically what it is in the situation that needs to be addressed and prioritize for forgiveness.
- Get a grip on the grief. It is worldly to hate, but God gives us clear directions in the Colossians scripture on how to live.
- Allow God to bring you to the peace of forgiveness over the power of controlling the situation. Work towards canceling the debt. Allow God to be the justice maker.
- Forgiveness is an action, and actions are a process. Instead of stopping and dwelling, seek the goodness of God to carry you through. "We need never shout across the spaces to an absent God. He is nearer than our own soul, closer than our most secret thoughts." A.Z. Toler
When there is a fracture...
More often than not, we will never get an apology from those who created the fractures (yes, we can have more than one). It is okay to not re-enter into hurtful situations, but never burn a bridge that God can use later!
It is our choice as to what filters in and fills the fracture. As we move through the healing process, we must call upon God in prayer and thanksgiving each time the hurt tries to take over our thoughts. When our focus is removed from self and placed in his hands, we will feel his love and gain peace. Sometimes, I must do this process many times before true healing comes. He always fills us up with enough hope to move forward!
Sometimes, we need help from others as we heal. A tiny bit of love and assurance goes a long way. Be that person.
"And be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving one another, just as God also forgave you in Christ." Ephesians 4:32
Your willingness to participate in the process of forgiveness is a measure of just how much you appreciate being forgiven by God. It isn't easy for us, but with God's help, we can do more than we can imagine!