Pride
Bloom

Pagliacci

 

Pagliacci is Italian for clowns, an opera by Leoncavallo. During the overture, the curtain rises. Then, from behind a second curtain, Tonio, dressed as his Commedia character Taddeo, addresses the audience ("Si può?... Si può?... Signore! Signori! ... Un nido di memorie"). He reminds the audience that actors have feelings too and that the show is about real people.

Growing up, I related well to the Smokey Robinson & the Miracles song, Tears of a Clown. I think because I was alone inside myself trying to navigate a world I did not understand. Here are the lyrics...

Oh yeah yeah yeah
Now if there's a smile on my face
It's only there trying to fool the public
But when it comes down to fooling you
Now honey that's quite a different subject
But don't let my glad expression
Give you the wrong impression
Really I'm sad, oh I'm sadder than sad
You're gone and I'm hurting so bad
Like a clown I appear to be glad (sad, sad, sad, sad)
Now they're some sad things known to man
But ain't too much sadder than
The tears of a clown when there's no one around, uh
Oh yeah, baby
Now if I appear to be carefree
It's only to camouflage my sadness
And honey to shield my pride I try
To cover this hurt with a show of gladness
But don't let my show convince you
That I've been happy since you
'Cause I had to go (why did you go), oh I need you so (I need you so)
Look I'm hurt and I want you to know (want you to know)
For others I put on a show (it's just a show)
Now they're some sad things known to man
But ain't too much sadder than
The tears of a clown when there's no one around, uh
Just like Pagliacci did
I try to keep my surface hid
Smiling in the crowd I try
But in my lonely room I cry
The tears of a clown
When there's no one around, oh yeah, baby
Now if there's a smile on my face
Don't let my glad expression
Give you the wrong impression
Don't let this smile I wear
Make you think that I don't care
'Cause really I'm sad

 

 

There are so many who wake up each day and put on the face of happiness when inside they are so sad, broken, hurt, grieving, or are trying to overcome a hurdle that seems impossible at the time. I'm not talking about non-believers or followers of Jesus; I'm talking about an issue that runs rampant through the human race.

We are so preoccupied with what the world is throwing off into the atmosphere of our minds as it spins out of control that we choose to not take the time to look into the hearts of those God places in front of us each day. I believe this breaks God's heart that we don't see. He removes the veil for us, and we walk right by without thinking twice. 

The tears of a clown when no one's around. Will we step in and be the ones who aren't fooled?  But when it comes down to fooling you. Now, honey, that's quite a different subject!

I pray that God allows me to see inside you and be sensitive to you and how you feel behind your smiles and joy. I believe we can have the Joy of Jesus and battle mental imbalances, as well.  Regardless of the physical, mental, or spiritual struggles, we need to be willing to love and serve others as they work their battles, many every day anew.

When I look at the clowns around our home, I am reminded to see past them.

 

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